Good morning, fellow chaos managers. Today we've got 3 simple tactics, 2 motivational quotes, 1 system for reflecting on the year.
Feel Closer To Your Spouse in 28 Days (~5 mins/day)
Daily prompt matched to your love language
One night question that doesn’t turn into a meeting
How to get aligned with a weekly 15-min meeting
Marriage Tactic
Every time you say “need,” your partner hears obligation. For example:
“I need you to help more.” or “I need you to listen.”
Rather replace “need” with “want.
“I want you to help me.” “I want you to listen.”
Same ask but different energy. Don’t miss the other two tips.
Parenting Tactic
Every extra warning chips away at your authority. Your child learns your words don’t mean action. So try this:
“Water stay in the bath.” Say it once, max of two times
Splash again pull the plug
Bath is over and start drying
Say “Bath is over today. We will try again tomorrow”
This isn’t punishment its having boundaries with love and that your words/warnings have meaning. Learn more about leadership with love.
Mental Health Tactic
Lots of highly sensitive people are verbal processors. They need to talk things out to declutter their mind. They usually are seen as “Yapperz” or self indulgent but its actually them trying to find peace. If this is your spouse make sure to give them their time and use reflective listening. Try to not to fix or give advice but just listen.
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2 Confidence Boosts
“There is no such thing as a perfect parent. So just be a real one.” - Sue Atkins
“Children are not a distraction from more important work. They are the most important work.” - C.S. Lewis
Family System
The Family Annual Review: A Real-Talk Reflection Guide for Busy Parents
Most family reflection exercises are designed by people who don't have a toddler screaming in the background. This isn't that. This is a practical system for dual-income parents who want to look back on the year without adding another item to the mental load.
The truth: Reflection isn't about perfection. It's about noticing what actually worked, what drained you, and what you want more of next year.
Step 1: The "Camera Roll" Rapid Review
Your phone already did the work.
How:
Scroll through photos from January to December
Pick ONE photo per month that represents either:
A win (big or small)
A lesson learned
A core memory
Save them to a "2025 Highlights" album (12 total)
Why it works: Zero prep, maximum memory jog. Plus, you'll realize your year wasn't just laundry and logistics.
Step 2: The Reverse Bucket List
Stop focusing on what you didn't do. List what you actually did.
How: Set a timer for 10 minutes. Write down everything you accomplished this year, including:
"Survived the transition to kindergarten"
"Actually used our meal delivery service consistently"
"Had three date nights"
"Didn't yell during bedtime routine... sometimes"
Why it works: Shifts you from scarcity mindset ("I'm failing") to abundance mindset ("Holy shit, we did a lot").
Step 3: The "More Of / Less Of" T-Chart
The fastest energy audit you'll ever do.
How: Draw a line down the middle of a page:
Left side (MORE OF): Activities, people, routines that gave you energy
Right side (LESS OF): Habits, commitments, obligations that drained you
Examples:
MORE OF: Saturday morning pancakes, voice notes with friends, solo grocery trips
LESS OF: Scrolling Instagram at night, volunteering commitments out of guilt, saying yes to every playdate
Why it works: Instant game plan for next year based on real data from this year.
Optional: If You Want To Dive Deepeer
These questions are adapted from Sahil Bloom's Personal Annual Review, but translated for family life.
Question 1: What Did We Change Our Mind About This Year?
Why this matters: Growth isn't about having all the answers. It's about updating your assumptions when reality proves you wrong.
Reflection prompts:
What parenting advice did you ignore this year that turned out to be right?
What "non-negotiable" routine did you let go of and everyone survived?
What belief about your kid(s) turned out to be wrong?
Example: "I thought our daughter needed strict bedtimes or she'd be a disaster. Turns out flexible bedtimes on weekends actually helped her self-regulate better."
Question 2: What Created Energy in Our Family This Year?
The concept: Your outcomes follow your energy. What consistently gave your family life, not just filled time?
Reflection prompts: PROFESSIONAL:
Work projects that made you proud (not just paid the bills)
Career wins that didn't steal family time
PERSONAL:
Activities that recharged you as individuals
Hobbies or habits you actually maintained
PEOPLE:
Friendships that didn't feel like obligations
Family members who showed up when it mattered
Action step: Circle 2-3 energy creators. Schedule them FIRST in 2026.
Question 3: What Drained Energy This Year?
The hard truth: Some energy drains are unavoidable (hello, sleep regressions). But many persist because we don't name them.
Reflection prompts: PROFESSIONAL:
Projects or commitments you said yes to out of guilt
Work habits that bled into family time
PERSONAL:
Mental load items that nobody else tracks
Routines you maintain because "we've always done it this way"
PEOPLE:
Relationships that feel one-sided
Social obligations that drain more than they fill
Action step: Pick 1-2 drainers to eliminate or delegate in 2026.
Question 4: What Were the "Boat Anchors" in Our Life?
Definition: Boat anchors are the people, mindsets, or habits that hold you back from where you want to go.
Types of boat anchors:
People: Those who belittle your parenting choices or make you feel "less than"
Mindsets: Self-limiting beliefs ("I'm not a 'fun' parent," "We're too busy for date nights")
Habits: Patterns that cut into your growth (doom-scrolling, avoiding hard conversations)
Reflection prompts:
What belief about yourself as a parent turned out to be bullshit?
What habit consistently sabotages your good intentions?
Who in your life makes you feel worse, not better?
Goal: Minimize the energy you give these anchors in 2026.
Question 5: What Did We Learn This Year?
The final reflection: When you zoom out, what are the 5-10 biggest lessons from this year? Can be about parenting, your relationship, yourself, etc
Examples:
"Connection beats correction with our kids"
"Date nights don't have to be fancy—they just have to happen"
"I'm a better parent when I prioritize sleep"
"Our kids need us present, not perfect"
Goal: Write down 5-10 transformative learnings to carry into 2026.
The Bottom Line
Busy parents don't need another guilt trip disguised as self-improvement. You need a simple system to:
Notice what actually happened (not just what you wish happened)
Celebrate what worked
Eliminate what drained you
Make better decisions moving forward
This isn't about perfection. It's about 5% better. That compounds.
Odds & Ends
Past Articles To Start With
Family Vision & Goals System - running a family without shared goals is like trying to use your GPS without knowing the destination. View here
Sunday 15-Min Weekly Meeting - Meeting weekly with your spouse prevents weekday chaos and saves your sanity. View here
Building Responsibility for Kids - Get your kids to actually do chores without turning into a nag or their maid service. View here
System to Divvy Up Chores Fairly - End the "I do everything" fights with a framework that actually works. View here
Meltdown Reset System - How to handle a full-blown toddler meltdown in aisle 7 without losing your mind or caving to their demands. View here
System for Batching Decisions - learn to mitigate your decision fatigue by batching decisions with themed days. View here
Date ideas to try instead of watching Netflix…. again?
Feel more connected with your spouse with after these 3 date night ideas!
Get a Pedicure Together: Book a side-by-side pedicure or DIY one at home for a relaxing, pampering date that feels indulgent and low-effort.
Analyze a Taylor Swift Album Track by Track: Pick one Taylor Swift album and go song by song sharing favorites, lyrics you love, and hot takes like true fans.
Find the master list of 200+ at home date ideas.
PS: Don’t miss the LoveSync 28-Day Challenge to help you feel more connected with your spouse. Learn more and join the waitlist (Get early bird price).